Honest Product Reviews-10/2/17

Hello!  I haven’t done a product review blog in a while so that is what we are going to do today.

The products that I will review are Freddy’s pepperjack burger, Pie 5 Pizza in general, and Turkey Hill’s pumpkin pie ice cream.

First up is the one from Freddy’s.  The pepperjack burger features their trademark flank steak patties but instead of a standard bun, this one uses a butter toasted potato bun.

I don’t know why everyone doesn’t toast and butter hamburger and hot dog buns.  Seriously, whether you make a bun for a restaurant or just at home go ahead and toast it then butter it.  You can thank me later.

As for the potato bun, I think it’s quite good.  This bun includes a subtly different flavor than standard buns.

The pepperjack burger also features pepperjack cheese, grilled jalapenos, and jalapeno fry sauce as its spicy ingredients.  At first I had thought that the pepperjack burger would be too spicy but then I found out that it was not the case.  This burger is spicy but not overly spicy, good for those who like hot foods while not having to eat foods of ghost pepper level spiciness.

Another ingredient of the pepperjack burger is two onion rings.  No more raw onions, or even sautéed onions, no, these are real onion rings!

As I said before, I have no idea why more restaurants are not using this ingredient.  The onions are deep fried and made with beer batter, making them quite flavorful.  Combine that with the fact that onions are natural flavor enhancers as it is, making them a useful ingredient on any food item.

If you want to know why onions are natural flavor enhancers, this is because the onions irritate the taste buds on our tongues and to that end, help us taste food more efficiently.

Anyone who does not cook with onions is either someone with a sensitive stomach or, someone that does not care about flavor.

If you cook and do not care about flavor, you have just implicated yourself as a Borg.

To finish up my review of the pepperjack burger, I can honestly say that it is a great sandwich and a must have item.

Now on to Pie 5 pizza.  The basic concept of Pie 5 is that you can have a personal, customizable pizza served to you in under five minutes.  The toppings are unlimited and sold to you at the same flat rate.  I have to admit, I wish I had thought of that.

The crusts of the pizzas offered are four different types, artisan thin, classic pan, traditional Italian, and gluten free.

I don’t care for artisan thin or any thin crust pizza.  This thin crust is advertised as being crispy like a cracker…Listen, if I wanted to eat pizza off a cracker, I would do just that.  No, give me a real crust with some depth and texture to it.

I recommend buying the classic pan or traditional Italian crust.  As for the gluten free, I haven’t tried that one yet and cannot speak about it.

The sauces available are alfredo, marinara, spicy marinara, barbeque sauce, olive oil, and buffalo ranch.  If you want to blend these sauces or just have one of them, the choice is yours!  Everything at Pie 5 is customizable.

I have tried the sauces at Pie 5 and consider the alfredo sauce to be the best one.  The marinara and spicy marinara are good but are nothing special, unless you want to use them solely as dipping sauces.  I have not tried the barbeque because I do not like mixing sweet and savory foods.   Go with the alfredo sauce.

The toppings are standard but there are some exceptions.  I will not bore you with the standard toppings instead, I will mention the unique ones.  The cheeses they offer are ricotta, cheddar, grated parmesan, and vegan cheese.  Try the ricotta and cheddar.

I avoid all vegan foods because being vegan is against my morals.

Other unique toppings include chicken sausage (really), artichoke hearts, kalamala olives, sun dried tomatoes, green olives, carmelized onions, and banana peppers.

The pizza itself at Pie 5 is great, just don’t go overboard with the amount of toppings you let the staff put on.  One layer of toppings will be sufficient.

As for specific combinations, I recommend the buffalo chicken pizza, the high five (meat lover’s), and the five star (a little of everything but not a supreme).

As for a custom pizza, try alfredo sauce with chicken and artichoke hearts.  You can thank me later.

The desserts at Pie 5 include brownie and cookie pies.  Both of these are extra sweet so if you like desserts with extra sugar (as do I), then you’ll love these.

As a matter of fact, I always cook desserts with extra sugar.  The phrase “it’s too sweet” rarely comes out of my mouth.

The garnishes for the pizzas include magic dust (cheese and spices), pesto sauce, tomato puree, among others.

I have not been able to try all of the breadsticks and salads yet, nor the cinnamon sticks.  However, I do want to, if you catch my meaning.

My review of Pie 5?  Do try it!  That place is definitely worth visiting.

Now to my final review for this post, the pumpkin pie ice cream.

Turkey Hill in general is a good ice cream maker.  However, their ice cream seems to be consistent with most east coast desserts in that it is not as sweet as other brands.

As I said before, I make my desserts extra sweet so the Turkey Hill style is not one that I would use.

I was excited when I saw that pumpkin pie ice cream was already out.  Pumpkin ice cream is on my list of holiday foods that I just have to get fully checked off during the holidays!

Seriously, how else is a foodie going to get the most out of the holidays?

I also had thought about making homemade pumpkin ice cream and after trying Turkey Hill’s, I’m going to have to do that!

The ice cream itself has that subtle, pumpkin flavor, which is just what you are looking for.

Why is it called pumpkin pie ice cream and not just pumpkin ice cream?  Because the ice cream contains pieces of pie crust.  And get this, they actually make the crust work for them!

Normally I would say that I hate pie crust and never fully understood why anyone would want to include such a bland, flavorless item in their food – especially in a dessert.  However, crust like this is okay with me!

No, it’s more than okay!

I appreciate pie crusts that have flavor in them and this Turkey Hill one is that sort.  The crust is loaded with cinnamon and other spices, making it sweet and flavorful unlike its bland, flaky cousin.

To conclude this review, Turkey Hill’s Pumpkin Pie Ice Cream is above average.  It’s worth your time and money if you want to eat pumpkin ice cream.  Aside from that however, the flavor is too subtle and not sweet enough to win over a skeptic.

That’s the end of this one!  What do you think of the aforementioned foods?  Am I wrong about them?

Coming up next on this blog: Your guide to Korean food.


Scott also has a comedy blog and combined blog.  And a theology e-book here.

Please consider visiting the donations page, which will be pumpkin spice flavored for the entire month of October.


Thoughts on Food 5- Sour Cream Donuts

Hello!  I did another product review that I think is worth mentioning.  The product in question is sour cream donuts from everyone’s favorite retail chain, Wally World.

Yes, it’s true, Wally World is not known for its donuts.  Matter of fact, it’s the last thing they are known for.  However, the shroud of mystery will soon be removed!  You will know exactly where they stand on donuts.

The standard glazed, chocolate iced, and lemon iced donuts of Wally World are actually good.  While they are not as good as a donut chains would be, these ones are worth buying.  In fact, they are even better than most store bought donuts.

However, I am reviewing the sour cream glaze donuts.

Here is what they look like, so you can recognize them in the future:

donuts 1

At first I tried the donuts straight up:


Then I tried them with coffee:


My opinion is that, these donuts are not worth buying.  Don’t do it.  The glaze is barely even sweet.  The sour cream flavor is too subtle and not unique.



A good food will have a lot of flavor and it will pop.  A lower quality food however, will remain bland.  These donuts did in fact, stay in their bland form in my mouth.

I tried dipping the donuts in the coffee but, that did not help them impress me either.  C’mon Wally World, it’s like you’re not even trying.

Seriously, I hope the CEO of Wal*Mart reeds this, you’re sour cream donuts can be described as, “not even trying!”

As for why I dipped the donuts in the coffee in the first place, that does in fact help improve the flavor.  Dipping a donut is like putting salt on fries, it’s what you do.  You do it for the flavor.  Period.

A coffee-dipped donut also melts the icing slightly, adding a unique perspective.  And if you like the flavor of coffee (which sane people do) then you will have your donut’s flavor and a coffee version of your donut.  Why is dipping a donut a bad thing?

Someone said to me that dipping donuts is a coastal thing, as in only people from the coasts would do that.  These coastal people were also said to have access to buttermilk bar donuts while those who are where I am do not.  Should dipping donuts be kept to the coast(s)?

I used a parenthesis on the S because, I do not know if the east coast wants to have dipped donuts.  And frankly, I am not sure that I want to know much about the east coast anyway.

I submit friends, that dipping donuts in coffee and sometimes tea should in fact, be an American thing.  A lack of buttermilk bars cannot be what determines whether or not donuts are dipped.

How would people know if donuts can be dipped without dipping them in the first place?

Wow, I kinda got off topic on this entry…please forgive my absent-minded mind.

I tried the sour cream donuts with coffee in order to see if the coffee would help the donuts taste better.  Nope, it did not.  Quite ironic indeed.  Or in other words, coffee drinking improves most foods but not all.

For some reason coffee does not go well with spicy food.  Odd.

The one thing I did like about the donuts was that by the time I got to the second one, they seemed to grow on me.  Maybe it was a bad batch or that first one was just plain terrible.  It’s hard to say.


I’m going to have to cut this one short friends.  Until next time.